THREE OATHS YOU NEED TO TAKE BEFORE STARTING A RELATIONSHIP

Personally, i have grappled with this question.I have closed my eyes, tapped into my inner knowledge just to find an answer to this question, am i ready for love? i have asked friends and some who are so self aware of themselves and hate to live in denial gave me a straight 'yes' or 'no' answer attached with  strong reasons.Though people's reason for not being ready for love varies, some have enough inner wisdom to know that they still have some personal growth to do,other are just scared of commitments and the list goes on .The bad news is that,the power of our thoughts also has a negative side.Self-doubt and other negative thoughts can lead to things that don't lend themselves well to our happiness and fulfillment but on the other side of the coin, we can choose to tap into out inner well of wisdom, figure out what we want , and believe in our beliefs,we can choose to expand these beliefs rather than limit our perspective and experience.

Though, i've done a lot of healing work on myself since my last break-up, and i have arrived at some place of true self love,How do i know i am truly ready for love? is a question i have asked myself so many times because i do not want to get half-way on a journey only to realize that i didn't have all it took to embark on the journey in the first place.A friend of mine who has been in very healthy,happy relationship told me 'girl don't start a relationship until you take these oaths'.After listening to her talk for an about an hour i must say i agree with her and her 'three essential oaths'.....so i am sharing them below:

1. "I TRUST AND ACCEPT MYSELF WHEN I FEEL DIFFICULT EMOTIONS"

I'm not sure about anyone else, but i woke human this morning.I keep waiting for the day i wake up superhuman but trust me so far that hasn't happened.Even the difficult and ugliest of our emotions are part of our human experience.Rather than side lining or sublimating them, we could listen to the sage wisdom that these emotions come with.It is inevitable that uncomfortable feelings will arise in and out of relationships because the people we love have the ability to trigger us most.Difficult emotions comes with great lessons to learn,never shut the door in there face even when your lover triggers them.

2) "I KNOW DEEP  DOWN MY CORE WHO I AM"

The kind of self love i am about to talk about is not that of repeating affirmation,no! true self love doesn't take force or convincing, it's a quiet knowing that comes from seeing and accepting all of who you are both the light and dark parts. Don't let fear hold you back, open the bad parts of you life, accept what you see and deal with them the best way you can,change cannot occur if you don't accept that something needs to be changed in the first place; similarly self trust may be just what you need to open up the possibility of something beautiful.

3) "I DO NOT PLAY THE BLAME GAME"

The one you love will definitely be wrong a times but not every time!you will never be the person who has it all right at all times just accept this fact.In relationships, people tend to blame there patterns for hurt and pain inflicted by other persons in their lives.Blaming your present partner for the pain your previous partner caused you is wrong and that is why you need to deal with the pain before you move on to the next, similarly some human beings just never like to accept responsibility for their wrong, they still find a way to blame shift.When we are stuck in the blame game, we aren't ready to own these parts of ourselves and we will have more difficult time creating a healthy relationship because we will be stuck in blame.

Therefore quit the blame game, accept and love even your difficult emotions and check deep down your core to know if you know yourself before the let the next man in!